UNDER PENALTY OF PERJURY

I had to renew Shasta, the wonder dog's, rabies tag (license) a few days ago. She had her first shot last year and now she was due for another one. This one is good for three years.

I was looking at the form that came with all the instructions, when I flipped the page over I saw this: I swear or affirm under penalty of perjury, and the box I checked.

WHOA!!!! Penalty of perjury if the county finds out that Shasta is not really spayed after all. How stupid is that? I understand the problem with unwanted dogs and cats. The over population by unresponsible owners and all, but a criminal offence with prison time. Laughable. It's like it was a *real* legal document. The only real thing I've done by checking that box and signing my name and it not being true, is paying $12 instead of $40. Is the *spay police* going to come out and arrest me? How would they ever find out? You certainly can't look at the animal and tell. I suppose an x-ray would show something. They don't even have enough *officers* to go around to pick up a biting dog or a stray.

Curiosity got the better of me and so I *Googled* penalty of perjury. Here's what I found out, it's hardly if ever prosecuted. Why? All the accused has to say is, *Well, it's like this, I really didn't understand. I thought it meant something else.* Case closed. Hmmmm.......I wonder if that would work on the most feared *under penalty of perjury* document we sign every year, the dreaded IRS 1040?

Another interesting encounter happened on Friday. I went to the doctor. While I was paying my bill the question of a PAP smear came up. I was due for one, well maybe. The doctor and I talked about it and he decided that no, 3-5 years would be fine. But he had written it on the cost sheet as something to have done next visit, which he forgot to mark off. The gal doing the paperwork thought I had had it done that day and I said I hadn't. Well, the office manager, which happens to be the doctor's wife was standing there and informed me, *It's a LAW that you have to have one done every year.* A LAW!!!?? I thought I still lived in the US of A. So, now the *PAP police* are going to come after me for not having one done? I wonder how many years that sentence is. A law.....IT'S A RECOMMENDATION, lady, not a law!

Things just like this really strike me as funny and laughable at best. Thanks guys for making my week more fun and entertaining. LOL

IT'S BEEN FIVE YEARS

Tomorrow, September 11 marks the fifth annivesary of the event that shock the USA and the rest of the world in recent years.

I remember that day as if it was yesterday. I was waiting for a friend to come by and pick me up. As I was waiting, I turned on the TV to kill some time. The first tower had already been hit and I watched as the second plane rammed into the second tower. It was like watching a movie, really. Then, the collapse of the towers. It was surreal with dust and debris raining down on the streets of NYC. My friend came and we watched together at her house as the rest of the events unfolded. The Pentagon and United 93 crash. Both of us sitting there in shock as to what had happened. Later in the day, the news was piecing together information and the recovery efforts had begun at all locations. The skys became eerily quiet as it emptied out of the normal business of traveling. Once in a while over Phoenix, we could hear, but not see, the military jets sent up to keep us safe from other attacks. Things pretty much came to a stand still, in all areas of our lives. People seemed kinder and caring to their fellow man. Flags flew everywhere as a symbol of our *togetherness.* No one knew what was really going on or happen next. Rumors and conspiracy theories abounded. Cover up allegations popped up. That was five years ago.

So, what's changed? Well, planes are flying again. Airport security is sort of working. People complain about their rights being taken away. Bush gets tons of bad press. Rumors, conspiracy theories continue, as do cover up allegations. We are at war in Iraq and Afghanistan. More people have died and continue to die as result of that day five years ago. Many questions go unanswered. People are back to being their *old* self. Flags no longer fly. Tons of *terrorist* sit in a prison in Cuba.

Have we forgotten that day or have we gone on with life? For me, no, I haven't forgotten. It's kind of like when a loved one dies. That day and event stays forever fresh. it's never forgotten, but we have to move on and continue. If we don't, we lose ourselves. Yes, it's an annivesary, a day of remembrance, but it shouldn't consume our lives. I have mixed feeling about all the hoopla memorial anniversary things planned for tomorrow. Sept. 16 doesn't mean much to other people, but to me, it's the day my Dad passed away. I get in a strange mood around the day of his annivesary. Not a depressed mood, but just in a *funk.* I miss my Dad every day, but this day especially. I don't or try not to wear it on my sleeve. Tomorrow, will be not really a special day for me. I don't plan on watching the annivesary *shows.* I will remember and reflect. I will probably put my flag out. It is a special day, but one I will not be wearing on my sleeve.

My thoughts and prayers are with the loved ones who lost a family member, friend or co-worker at all locations. My thoughts and prayers are with the men and women in Iraq and elsewhere. God bless each and every one.

Tomorrow, give your loved ones and friends a hug and tell them you love them, because you never know it might be the last time you ever see them. PEACE! :-)

CRIKEY! THE CROCODILE HUNTER IS DEAD

Steve Irwin aka *Crocodile Hunter* famous for his enthusiatic antics on TV was killed by a stingray barb to the heart while filming at the Great Barrier Reef off Queensland. Efforts to save the 44 year old failed.

Whether he was wrestling an croc or trying to capture a deadly viper, his style of *reporting* was always with humor and at times cocky. Nothing seemed to phase this guy.

He pulled a *Wacko Jacko* stunt in 2004 by dangling his 1 year old son in front of a crocodile, much like you would a chicken. This caused much criticism.

I'm not a huge fan, but I have watched some of his shows and enjoyed his sense of humor. He will be missed.

RIP Crocodile Hunter, you died doing what you loved to do.

DOGS ARE WIGGING OUT!!!!

Literally!!!!! You can now buy your furry companion a wig. Or how about matching wigs for you and your pet. I suppose that's possible.

Ruth Regina is designing hairpieces for dogs. She is making braids, curls and extensions that can be dyed any color, highlighted and styled to order. So, that's why I assume you could have matching hair with your pampered pet. The picture is of Regina's dog, Sweetie with Shirley Temple style braids. I don't know how much you would have to shell out for these, but it looks like something I could do myself.

Regina thinks just because Paris Hilton, Brintney Spears and Nicole Richey, with their *pocket pets* and those pets are wearing such things as sunglasses, tiaras, visors and clothes, all the while riding around in Chanel carriers, that there has to be a big market for wigs as well. Because all of us who own a dog must buy these things for our pets as well.

The wigs are made out of synthetic or real human hair dyed any color including pastels. Oh goody!!! I want to get a rainbow wig for Shasta, the wonder dog. She would look cute in say oh.....maybe something like a huge afro dyed rainbow colors. Each wig has openings for the ears and an elastic band to hold it in place.

The *Yappy Hour* is a cascade of curls. *It's a good choice for hairless dogs,* Regina says. Well, if you bought a hairless dog because you wanted the novelty of a hairless dog, why buy it a wig?

The *Peek a Bow Wow* can fall down over part of the dogs face. *It's a good choice for any dog that has feelings, you know, a sexy dog,* she says. A sexy dog? What's that?

The *Rover R-r-rug* is a straight hair style that can be used as bangs (hmmm......Donald Trump comes to mind on this one) and the *Buddy Braids,* good for a dog with a little hair because they hold on with clips.

I'm a dog lover. My dog is spoiled. My dog is like a child. I consider myself a *pet parent.* Do I dress Shasta up in clothes? NO! She would probably bite me if I did. Does she wear Halloween costumes? NO! Is her collar rhinestone studded? NO! Will she be wearing a Regina wig anytime soon? Well......NO! She doesn't even have a $6,000 bedroom that I read recently about one dog having. She even has to eat dog food. She is a joy and a best friend, but no frills here.

I agree with Regina, that in many ways dogs are just little people in fur coats. Sometimes I prefer her company over a human's. She's always happy to see me and greets me with much fan fare. Never get mad. Always listening when I talk to her. Sorry, Shasta, you're not getting a wig. And that's final!!!!!